Rachel Simmons » Girl Tips

GirlTip #57: Everyone is NOT Looking at You

Rachel Simmons — Sun, 05 Jun 2011 04:38:08 +0000

On vacation, I went to a gym & worked out in front of a large window. Several people walked by and stared. I grew uncomfortable. Why were they staring at me? On my way out, I caught my own reflection in the window. Guess the Girl Tip.

GirlTip #56: Are You Idealizing Someone Else’s Life?

Rachel Simmons — Thu, 05 May 2011 13:54:26 +0000

If you’ve decided someone else has a perfect life, take your emotional temperature. Idealizing someone else may feel like giving a compliment, but it can be a sneaky form of self-criticism. Are you feeling insecure or sad? That other person is likely just a distraction for what’s really going on inside. Real admiration shouldn’t come at your own expense.

GirlTip #55: It’s Always Worse in Your Head

Melissa Hardy — Thu, 10 Mar 2011 03:37:02 +0000

What if she’s angry? What if she’s blowing me off? What you fear or worry about in your own head is almost never as bad in reality. We are our own worst horror movie directors. Notice it, be gentle with those predictions, & save yourself a ton of angst.

GirlTip #54: Your Body Talks, Even When You Don’t

Rachel Simmons — Wed, 23 Feb 2011 03:42:23 +0000

You may not be talking, but your body might be. Crossed arms, rolled eyes, tossed hair: it all says something. Think about it this way: if you’re burning calories while you’re trying to express yourself, you might not get what you want out of that conversation.

GirlTip #53: Get Smart About Guys and Status

Rachel Simmons — Fri, 11 Feb 2011 05:29:15 +0000

Know how guys get popular? By being players, right? So when he asks you to send him a hot picture of yourself, you inject his phone with a 100% unfiltered shot of status. He gets to show his people the proof that girls like him. Get smart about how guys get status & attention, and you’ll never send a picture again.

GirlTip #52: Loyalty Doesn’t Mean Hating Who Your Friends Hate

Rachel Simmons — Thu, 09 Dec 2010 01:34:35 +0000

Do you expect friends to get angry at people you’re fighting with? That kind of loyalty isn’t part of a healthy friendship. Conflict is scary & lonely, but it’s yours, not your friends’. Get sympathy, not support. Asking friends to have your back ups the drama & puts them in an unfair position. Stay classy & keep it one-on-one.

GirlTip #51: Healing a Conflict Takes Time

Rachel Simmons — Thu, 14 Oct 2010 15:07:45 +0000

Is an apology an end? Moving beyond a conflict in a close relationship can’t mean picking up where you left off. Be patient. Apologies stitch wounds, but real healing takes time. Try not to get upset if it doesn’t happen fast enough, & make yourself vulnerable as you feel ready.

GirlTip #50: The Importance of Naming Your Fears

Rachel Simmons — Wed, 11 Aug 2010 00:22:57 +0000

When you’re feeling anxious about doing something, be it a phone call or big request or tough conversation, ask yourself what’s the worst that can happen? Can you bear it? Much of the time, you can. We can face our fears when we know them clearly — & take the leaps that bring us to amazing new places.

GirlTip #49: Listen to Your Emotions

Rachel Simmons — Fri, 18 Jun 2010 00:17:00 +0000

Painful emotions don’t only mean life is hard. They’re a sign from within that it may be time to make a choice. Sadness & anger are opportunities for change: in relationships, work, school and spirit. Listen to the feelings: what choices are they asking you to make?

GirlTip #48: Why We Should Avoid Personalizing a Mistake

Rachel Simmons — Thu, 03 Jun 2010 02:46:48 +0000

It’s hard not to feel like you’ve let someone down when you make a mistake. Try not to confuse a comment about your performance as a statement about your relationship with the person. Otherwise, we get distracted by the question of whether or not we’re likable – instead of how we can improve.